Fathers, Here’s What to Do When Your Daughters Start Dating

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Notes: I’m writing this as an insight for parents, particularly fathers, whose daughters have started dating. I know teenage years are delicate and can be tricky, and you might mean well but your daughter might take it differently. I’m offering an opinion from the other side, based on my experience.

Recently I read an essay by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, titled Why We All Should Be Feminist (by the way, if you haven’t read that, do it now. One of the best pieces I’ve read). In one part of the book, Adichie points out the different standards we hold for boys and girls.

If we have sons, we don’t mind knowing about their girlfriends. But our daughters’ boyfriends? God forbid. (But we of course expect them to bring home the perfect man for marriage when the time is right).

Reading this made me realize how hard dating could be for a young woman, and it wasn’t just me who experienced this. A lot of women out there go through the same thing. So here I’m talking as a woman who has had the experience of dealing with the difficulties and awkwardness of dating a guy when her father acted somehow less than nice to the guy. Read more


Review | Lalala Festival 2016

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Last week I went to Lalala Festival. It is — borrowing their tagline — the first international forest festival in Indonesia. If you’ve heard about it, you probably have heard about the uproar as well. Their Instagram account was flooded with angry comments from the festival goers, complaining about the festival that was disastrous. Emotions aside, most of the comments deliver the truth about the festival: customers didn’t get the things they had paid for.

I’m not complaining about my muddy shoes and dirty clothes. That much was expected, as I’d imagined this festival to be a bit like Woodstock Festival. But there were too many things that went horribly wrong, and I felt that with this experience, the ticket wasn’t worth it at all. Read more


October Reading Wrap Up

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This October was a good one, reading-wise. Partly because I finished all work ahead of schedule, and partly because of all those Kindle deals. I’d been introduced to books by authors I hadn’t known before, and for the most part, I loved it! There are books by one particular author that I wasn’t really impressed with, so much so that I felt like it was such a waste of money and time (especially since I bought three books altogether, never again!). But the rest made up for it, especially books by Nicola Yoon and Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. I’m now officially a fan. Read more


And It All Started with This Blog

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When I started this blog 5 years ago, I wouldn’t have thought that sharing things online could actually bring me to the perfect strangers, who later would become my friends. Some friends stay online, and a few made it offline, aka the real life.

I first got to know Amanda through her blog. I think it was her who commented on my blog first, and since then we’ve been commenting on each other’s blog. We made plans to meet when she got back to Indonesia (she was doing a master’s degree in the UK at that time), and today it finally happened. Read more