I’m starting to get what everyone has been warning me about winter here; the gloom, the bone-chilling weather, and the worst of all, the short daylight. Those warm summer days already feel like they belong to another lifetime.
This week was particularly exhausting. I don’t know if it’s because of the winter affecting me, or the packed schedule I had, or both. But I was so relieved when the weekend came and I could sleep in.
That’s not to say that I’m not enjoying life at the moment. Quite the opposite, I’m enjoying every bit of it. I always look forward to my Swedish class, even if it means that I get home at 10 pm on Mondays and Wednesdays. My job gives me the spark and boosts that I was craving (and sorely needed), and while I know there’s a lot to learn and things to be done, I relish all the opportunities and challenges.
It’s been a long way since I had my biggest breakdown after coming here, back in July. At that time, it felt like everything was against me, and truth be told, the thought of moving back to the UK entered my mind so many times. H and I even discussed the possibility of it, and went as far as setting up a deadline for our decision.
But things did get better.
Last Thursday, as I was having a julbord (Christmas buffet) with my colleagues, emotions suddenly hit me. In between the chats and laughter and the burlesque performers doing their Christmas repertoire (that’s another story for another time), I suddenly felt overwhelmed with so much gratitude and relief. That I’m here, with a job, settling in.
After 8 months, this place is starting to feel like home, and I don’t feel like an outsider anymore.
I’m so incredibly grateful.